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Mafia Gazette Issue 10
The Mafia Gazette For All The News That Is News (E&OE) Issue 10 28 March 2012 GLUE FACTORY GIVES GRIEF The ability to release and retire horses is proving to be a problem as betting accuracy across the country falters. Detroit’s Goat, reported to have one of the best stables in the country, took to the streets to comment on the subject. He was reported stating, “This can be bad for business. These sure things not racing anymore will make it slightly more difficult to fix a race, which means less money for everyone involved. Sure some of these new comers may do well and make some new owner some money but I bet the overall money lost by making incorrect bets will do more harm than good.” With over twenty-five horses already sent to pasture, even trifecta legend Rocky Carroll is feeling the pain of the constant turnover, winning only two races out of an entire 6:00pm set - unnaturally low for his abilities. While horse owners continue to roll the die and spend millions hoping the next new horse they pick up could earn an easy 200k, it was Goat who put it best “Let’s just hope people start to realize that keeping these crap horses in the races is a benefit for all of us.” RICH 'DEALING' WITH HOODLUMS & HATE Following yet another organized attack on New York, Rich of ‘The Dealers’ called together a press conference to address the attacks and his position. The businessman stood fast and proud under the rain of questions from the dozen reporters. “Rich, Rich, do you feel you are being unjustly targeted? Or are attacks like these par for the course when running New York?” “Keeping out hoodlums isn't helping, are you considering a lock down? Do you have any sort of plan to put an end to these random attacks?” “Is it true you ran and hid like a like a coward halfway through the battle and came back after it was over?” Rich brought the group to silence with the raise of his hand before speaking at great length. “Let me address something firstly. Myself and my organization are seen as some sort of criminal outfit. Specifically we have been compared to "The Conceptualists", a mob family that operated out of New York City previously. I am the head of The Dealers, a diversified business group comprised of diamond dealers, like myself, as well as other business men and women in other areas Some of my associates have sort of part ties with this Conceptualist group, yes. Some of my associates have been accused of even having current ties with this group. I do not dictate who my business associate's friends are. They may chose to spend their time with whomever they please, so long as it doesn't interrupt business. So yes. I take offense to the actions of lowlife criminals unjustly targeting myself and my organization. I am not considering a lock down. I work very closely with the mayor and other city officials to try to help the city of New York to grow and prosper. As a businessman myself I am well aware of the negative effects closing a city off to travelers will have and this is not something myself or anyone wants. We will continue working with the local police to try to eliminate the presence of criminals, hoodlums and street bosses, from the streets of New York. As for those questioning my mettle and valor... I am not a fighter. I am a business owner. Violence is foreign to me. So the idea that I am expected to stand in the streets with gun drawn trading shots with hoodlums like I'm Doc Holiday is ludicrous. The other day when I had become targeted by armed criminals I shot back, as my bodyguards supplied me with a weapon of my own in the event I ever got into trouble with out them. I was shot in my shoulder, but managed to kill my attacker. I then flew to my home in Miami to get away from the madness and hopefully disperse any other attackers from the city when they saw I was no longer there.” Rich paused for a moment and all was abnormally silent. "And lastly, though I am not a violent man, I do hold some weight. I dine with the Kennedys, play golf with the Rockafellers, attend the birthday's of the daughters of senators. If I do anything, I will ensure that those perpetrating these violent acts, as well as anyone caught aiding them, will be brought to a swift justice." Rich refused any further questions and returned to his home in Miami following the conference. GOAT - GUILEFUL GUARDED GENIUS First Made Man to appear across the country, Detroit leader Goat and his family are shrouded in mystery. To put a little light on the subject, a Detroit family member was contacted for this exclusive interview. The member agreed, providing they remain anonymous. Q: Detroit seems to have an unbelievable amount of Bodyguards for the number of people in the family. Bodyguards are expensive. Is there outside funding going on? A: Yes, we do have an outside source bankrolling us. We have a banker in every city that grabs bodyguards and brings them to us. Q: And how does Detroit afford its bodyguards? A: Horses is how we fund things. Five good horses and you make more than a mill a day. Goat has one of the top three stables in the street. Q: Why is no one ever around? A: We are never around all at once because we start a lot of stuff, but we don’t stay around giving us culpable deniability. Q: Why are the crew numbers so small? A: Our numbers are small because it is a trust factor. We can’t take in people we don’t know because we have a lot of stuff in our crew forum that outsiders shouldn’t see. Q: Why do you we never hear from Goat? It was a shock to everyone when he hit Made Man first. It left a lot of people asking, ‘Who’? A: You never hear from Goat because when something happens no one suspects him because he is so quiet. Q: Okay, last question. Are you aware of any big plans Goat may have for the near future? Details not required, just confirmation of the existence of such a plan. A: That’s the one thing I can’t answer. Omerta. While a lot of questions remain concerning The Motor City Club and its crew, it has become apparent Goat is going about his business in a very stealthy and tactical manner that has only worked in his favor thus far. We look forward to seeing more of this strategy in the future. WHERE’S WALDO? Sin City Syndicate crew leader Waldo was nowhere to be found late Tuesday night. While the Made Man had only recently laid claims in the City of Lights, expectations were optimistic. Unfortunately, Waldo has suddenly gone missing. Rumor has it his name has been listed in the obituaries, but details concerning his alleged end have yet to be released. While the investigation continues, and no body yet discovered, it begs the question, where IS Waldo? WINNING NUMBERS By Lady Luck Sunday’s Jackpot of over $1,800,000 appears to have no winning recipients. Draw #9 on March 25th numbers were 1,4,25,28,38,42. Draw #10 is scheduled April 1st at 8:00pm. Only 46 tickets have been sold. Get your ticket today for a part of the pot. IN DEPTH GAZE INTO THE ZODIAC: 12 PART SERIES By Madame Mystery Week 2: Taurus - The Bull (APRIL 20 - MAY 20) The second sign of the zodiac is concerned with --Beauty, romance, sentimentality, sensuality --Materialistic values, wealth, prosperity --Nature, harmony, love of living things --Possession, control, security, dependability --Habit, organization, tenacity, kindness --Shyness, cautiousness, trustworthiness, calmness --Appreciation of values, talents, abilities Taurus is the fixed earth sign of the zodiac and can be likened to an ancient rainforest full of enduring trees and rare plants that is teeming with the beauty of life. This sign represents an enduring, practical reality. A typical Taurean personality contains the following positive traits: --A careful and conservative outlook --Dependable and offers enduring loyalty --Calm and patient --Artistic --Thorough --Attentive --Values the talents of others --Very loving --Resourceful --Gentle and placid --Excellent cook --Good sense of time and is orderly Whereas the negative traits follow: --A tendency to be self-indulgent --Can be stubborn, obstinate, and get stuck in a rut --Materialistic --Slow-moving --Little to say --Delays action by lengthy pondering --Easily embarrassed --Boring --Insensitivity Inside anyone who has strong Taurus influences is a person who takes the long-term view and proceeds slowly but surely, because Taurus is only interested in the very best of everything. Taurus's view is that the best is worth waiting for. Taurus loves to luxuriate in sensual delights and desires secure material prosperity. The two secret fears of Taurus are being disturbed or of being left wanting. Taurus will wait for anything, even to get angry. When Taureans do eventually have to express anger, it can be devastating and is so disturbing to themselves that it takes a while for them to recover both their composure and their self-esteem. The typical Taurus Male: --Has a stocky body, which is muscular if he does a lot of physical activity --May be plump --Will bear the discomfort of an injury or a disability with extreme stoicism --Has very clear skin --Is likely to have plenty of hair and can grow a substantial beard --Walks with determination --Rarely changes his point of view --Works hard to build security --Is astute and can evaluate a situation very quickly in financial terms --Is quiet and has a low-key charm --Is unpretentious --Enjoys comfort --Can be defensive and suspicious in a new or unexpected situation --Is wary of others taking advantage of him --Dresses to create an image of respectability --Uses influential connections to get what he wants A typical Taurus female: --Tends to have a rounded body --Has a beautiful complexion and hair which always looks in excellent condition --Has an air of mystery about her because she does not flaunt her sexuality --Has a strong body capable of hard work --Is an introvert --Has considerable moral and emotional courage --Takes people as they come --Is very loyal to her friends and sticks by them if they are in trouble --Has practical common sense --Is deeply sensual --Prefers the real to the artificial To Taurus, love is a physical, sensual romance which can be expected to last forever. Taureans are attracted by physical beauty and are very sensitive to perfume, color, light, and sound. Taurus in love will have many of the following characteristics: --Devoted and steadfast --Settles quickly into a stable affair --Loves glamor --Is extremely vulnerable to people who accept his or her affection but only want a flirtation --Will never forgive a betrayal --Expects his woman to be very feminine --Expects her man to be all male --Expects a promise to be kept and never broken --Expects a wholesome, natural approach to physical love --Expects to be pampered --Expects to wait for a commitment to be made Taurus is most compatible with: Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Virgo, Capricorn, Pisces, Aries Taurus is least compatible with: Libra, Sagittarius Colors: pastel shades and blues Plant: mallow Gemstones: topaz Metal: copper Animals: bull ADVERTISEMENTS +++++ OPENING SOON The Flaming Torch will be opening soon in Miami. Everyone will be treated to dancing, singing, drinking, and gaming (for a fee). So please come down to Miami Beach and have fun! +++++ WRITERS WANTED- The Gazette is looking for more writers of current events news to add to the newspaper. Good rates of pay offered. Contact Carmela_DeAngelis at the Gazette offices in Chicago with your application. +++++ Advertising in the Gazette is easy, and it’s FREE! Just send your advertisement in to the Gazette offices and we will print it here for you. +++++